Wednesday, February 22


This time last year, BOY was my life different
St. Gianna Molla was a Saint that I was introduced to me by my friend Gisele when I was pregnant with Isaac in 2014.
St. Gianna is a modern day saint (living in the 1960's)...She was a pediatrition and a mommy.  

St. Gianna Molla was 39 years old and pregnant with

her 4th baby......JUST LIKE ME!  And she was chronically ill.....JUST LIKE ME! And she was counseled against having her 4th baby for fear for her own life, JUST LIKE ME..... and she chose her baby's precious life over her own in April 1962.......I chose my little Isaac's precious life above my own life in 2014!!

St. Gianna Molla died 7 days after her baby was born

(a little precious baby girl, fittingly named Gianna Emmanuela....after her mother)

Unlike beautiful St. Gianna Molla, my Precious and Merciful Lord, Jesus allowed me to have Isaac and to keep my life

But back before this amazing outcome came to fruition.....I was really sick, pregnant with our fourth baby, and afraid...but feeling comforted, knowing that I was choosing Him above reason and above the world's view....
So, I knew that we couldn't go wrong, but nervous about what His Perfect Will might be for our human-ness doesn't always understand His Perfect ways

So, anyway

(Jeremy always says that I am too wordy and go off on tangents, and I do struggle with this, so I am sorry)

During this scary time, my friend Gisele (introduced me to) by telling me all about St. Gianna and blessed me by allowing me to keep her holy card throughout my pregnancy.

St. Gianna was a saint that I admired from the very first time that I learned of her and she was an example of the kind of Christian mother that I wanted to be

I lived through Isaac's pregnancy, struggling with my health throughout, but all in all.....
Isaac was born healthy and perfect on March 29, 2014
I was struggling after he was born to keep up with my health and having a new baby
(so we slept a lot, as I was not feeling well at this picture, I had a really terrible sinus infection)

 Exactly one month after Isaac was born (April 29th), at 6:30am
I stopped breathing, and was rushed to the hospital.  Jeremy was told that it didn't look good for me.  Family flew in and everyone stormed Heaven to save my life
 (I do not like this picture at is hard to look at, as it brings chills to my body, but I use it to glorify God, always remembering how far He carried me)
I was put on a ventilator for the first time

And hearing the cries of the faithful, my merciful Lord Jesus saved His undeserving child from death, when my life was spared.  God also saw fit to not only save His little girl, but to bring forward my health struggles that I had held as a private cross throughout my entire life.....for the world to see. And He was glorified!
I slowly healed, and we gave all of the glory to God

(I love this picture of me and my boys)



 Then in 2015, Jeremy and I were blessed with yet another baby.  We were over the moon with joy and so grateful to have been entrusted with another tine soul, making me a mommy of five!

(My friend Rhonda bought me this shirt as she new how excited I was to have five kids)

 At the same time as we celebrated, there was a very REAL fear for my health.  Some of our friends and family were even angry that we would put my life in danger yet again, after they had prayed so hard for me only one year earlier.  
It was a bitter cross to bear as we knew that the world would not understand.  We felt called to live always open to life and we knew that our Lord decided this for us, as He called us to another new and difficult journey. 
We faithfully knew that God would see us through and that He would be glorified through this precious child.
We tried our best to be obediant, but fearful of how He would see fit to be glorified through baby Gracie Ann.  Would His Will be to call her home to Heaven right away and/or would His Will  be to call me back to Heaven?
That was yet to be we prayerfully held tight to Christ and worked through the many health trials that I was going through at that time...everytime one of us would fear, the other would be strong!
God gave us the strength to lift up each other

In any outcome, we knew with everything in us, that He was in control....and His Will, whatever it may be, was what we truly wanted

The world knows SO LITTLE truth, but as humans, we are surrounded by it, and it is hard to always see beyond it.  This made hope so hard for us at times.
So we just went on....taking care of our 4 kids (especially our little I grew our 5th)

Isaac HATED that shark costume

Okay.....back to this LONG story

Jesus is NOT practical.....He is Divine!  He knows no time nor space, as He created and has command over ALL things!

It was a most beautiful cross to trust in Him, in spite of the human fear that we held deep in our hearts

One of many consolations that Jesus showered us with, was He constanty revealed His Most Beautiful Face to us in so many ways, reminding Jeremy and I that He was always with us

These pictures were taking almost exactly a year ago last week (February 6, 2016)
It's me and Gracie Ann  


Wow, I AM wordy.....

I was pregnant with Gracie Ann and very sick, mostly bed-ridden and constanly in and out of the hospital!!  
Some wonderful friends of ours were hosting St. Gianna's daughter at their home, all the way from Italy where she lives!  
This is the daughter that St. Gianna sacrificed her life for!
Our friends were hosting a dinner for her, where she would speak about her life and mostly about her mother.
When we were so kindly invited to this blessed event to meet the daughter of a saint that was so near and dear to me.....
Pregnant again (now with our 5th baby) that the world said I shouldn't have....Jeremy and I wanted SO MUCH to attend and to meet her!  

The day of the dinner came and Jeremy and I knew that I wasn't well enough to attend (I had a lung infection and was on IVs at the time), so sadly Jeremy declined our invitation, with much gratitude that we were even invited.

Here is the most blessed part...

Our thoughtful friends who were hosting the dinner, told Gianna about why Jeremy and I could not come to meet her.....and she felt called to meet me!!

Totally undeserving "little me" was so very blessed by a visit (at our house) from the daughter of a very special Saint...

At first in tears, I told Jeremy to tell our wonderful friends David and Lisa that we could not except such a gift, as we are so undeserving

But our Lord humbled us, when she insisted on coming to meet our family, as it was reminisent of her mother's life

(She was never really knew her mother, as she died 7 days after Giana Emmanuela was born)

 St. Gianna Molla as well as her daughter Gianna Emmanuela are true examples of beautifully strong faith and also an example of loving without counting the cost.

We were very overwhelmed with excitment and gratitude to our friend who so graciously drove her over to our house, and we praised our Lord for surprising us with such an AMAZING blessing.

Our entire family all sat in awe as Gianna spoke of amazing stories of her childhood and of her mother's undying faith.

We could barley wrap my heads aound the fact that we were even in her presence!

WE simply sat at her feet with, just lstening to all that she had to say
And to think that the daughter of St. Gianna took the time to come and share such wonderful and blessed time with us.

It was defintiely our Lord revealing His most Holy Face to our family, comforting us to know that He is here with us and that He is in control.

That day we learned a lesson of gratitude and how we need to humbly except special gifts from our Lord, even if we do not feel worthy of them.

He is our Father and He can bless us however He wants to and He LOVES to bless His children!!
He loves to see us humbly except those blessings and praise Him above all!
Here is our family with Gianna Emmanuela....Isaac was unfortunately napping so he could not be in the picture. Gracie Ann is in the picture but hidden inside of my belly, still baking

We will never forget that day for as long as we live.  Gianna has been so gracious as to keep in contact with Jeremy, checking in on me and baby Gracie Ann as we went through, and contiue to experience struggles.
She is praying for her holy mother to intercede for our health....what a huge blessing to us.

God is just so good to us (as He is to all of His children....
 It is hard not be overwhelmed by such blessings.....our human-ness cannot always understand it sometimes.

It took me a year, as I was too nervous to share this amazing blessing because it seemed too huge and a bit presumptuous.
But our Lord kept tugging at my heart to stop making it about me and my fears, and to share His great Love for us and to present to the world yet another example of how He can make, what seems impossible....possible


Thank You Lord Jesus for this great and undeserved blessing.  You give us so much strength and You continually reveal to us Your might and Your undying and perfect Love for us.  We love you, dear Lord Jesus

love, kerry ann