LITTLE KICKS

During Advent, As I ponder the Beautiful Virgin Mary preparing for her precious little one to be born, I prepare my heart for your arrival as well.  It is one way in which I feel very connected with our most Holy Mary. We are both mothers and even my imperfect love, compared to her perfect sinless love, still allows me a small peek into what she might have been feeling on this very day, just weeks before Jesus was born. 

Thank you, Lord Jesus for the blessing of being a mother and for the wonderful an amazing miracle of growing this little body, whom I already love with my entire heart, RIGHT HERE inside of my own. For my body has never been my own, it is a sanctuary that I offer to You, God, but in this true miracle, the realization of this sanctuary is never quite felt as strong as it does right now, as I have this precious little life growing inside of me.

My Dearest Little Gracie Ann,

Guess what......I felt you move inside of me today for the first time!  Your sweet and fragile little body was kicking around inside of my tummy and I felt overwhelmed with blessings to be able to feel it!  What a joy-filled moment that was for your mommy!  As I laid in bed, after a busy day, you were finally awake to enjoy the silence of my stillness.....you had slept for most of the day, as my constant movement rocked you back and forth in forced slumber!  Of course as you know, I am already in love with you and I love being able to have this special mommy/daughter time all to ourselves.  Gracie, this time together will never be repeated in such a special and intimate way as it is right now.  I will cherish every moment and write these blessings directly on my heart for the memories to last for a lifetime!

Your brothers and sisters are so very anxious to get to see you moving around and feel your little kicks from the outside of my silly round belly, but they will have to wait just a little longer before they share in this great joy.....for now it is just for us.

I love you Gracie Ann and I am counting down the weeks until you can be kissed and held in my arms....I am 4 1/2 months along and so there are 20 more weeks to go!

Love,
Mommy

OUR LITTLE BABY GIRL "GRACIE ANN"

YOU ARE A BEAUTIFUL BABY GIRL

"GRACIE ANN"

Dear Gracie Ann,

We got to see you today!  Your sweet little face warmed our hearts as you jumped and squirmed with excitement all over the screen!  We pray for your safety and growth each and every night and cannot wait to hold you in our arms.  We got to find out today that you are a little girl!!  We have a sweet little sister on the way!

We all kind of thought that you were a little girl......I guess that in our hearts, we already knew you! We official named you Gracie Ann.  Ann, after your mommy....ME! I grew up as "Kerry Ann" and now you will grow up as " Gracie Ann" and mommy is so humbled and blessed that daddy wanted you to carry on my name!!

Your first name is Gracie, which means "Unmerited favor and love of God, or God's Favor"  You are a virtue and a beautiful gift from Jesus.  Your first name, Gracie is in honor of a very special girl we know, named Grace, that we just know will be a special person in your life.  Gracie, You are here because our Lord desired it and He showed His Mightiness in how you are coming into this world, through a very unlikely vehicle that only He could have envisioned as a vehicle.  He is so good to us and He has yet again blessed us, with you!

Your big brother, Isaac, wanted to lay RIGHT BY mommy (on the table) as we saw you on the screen.  He is so excited to be a big brother....he just doesn't know it yet : )

Giving some kisses and "nosies" to a concerned little Isaac, laying next to me wondering what they are doing to mommy

Look at your little hands on your face....You are just so precious little Gracie Ann!

We love you so much!

Oh, thank you Jesus, for sweet little Gracie Ann!  We could not imagine a day without her....You have amazed us again with Your Graciousness.  You have showered us yet again with Your Merciful Love for Your most undeserving children!  Thank you for always blessing us so far beyond our dreams!  You see everything and You delight in our delight.  You are a wonderful and mighty and perfect Father.

Praise You Lord Jesus, King of Kings

CONFESSION

JESUS GAVE ME A TOTALLY AMAZING SURPRISE TODAY, AS HE CALLED OUT TO ME!

Being pregnant, mother of five, sick, weak, and overwhelmed, I had struggled getting any time to share in the most blessed and cleansing Sacrament of Confession!  I hadn't gone in a couple of months, and I was truly tarnished, bruised and beaten!  I had, of course, been sorrowful, repented, and felt ashamed for the sins that I had saddened my sweet Jesus with, but had not had the most blessed opportunity to throw myself at His Feet, by running to His precious servants (His holy priests) to whom He granted special gifts of forgiveness to, in order that they may guide us from our earthly exile, home to Him.

John 20:19-23

"19 In the evening of that same day, the first day of the week, the doors were closed in the room where the disciples were, for fear of the Jews. Jesus came and stood among them. He said to them, 'Peace be with you,'

20 and, after saying this, he showed them his hands and his side. The disciples were filled with joy at seeing the Lord,

21 and he said to them again, 'Peace be with you. 'As the Father sent me, so am I sending you.'

22 After saying this he breathed on them and said: Receive the Holy Spirit.

23 If you forgive anyone's sins, they are forgiven; if you retain anyone's sins, they are retained."

It is plain and simple....this is what He asks us to do and who am I to question my loving and mighty Creator, King of Heaven and of Earth

Confession is truly the hardest, but most  awesome physically Grace-filled Sacrament, of the Seven.  I literally feel physically renewed each time I leave the Confessional, after so humbly laying all of my shortcomings at the Foot of the Cross, as they may burn in a life-giving sacrifice for my soul.

Remember, Jesus asks me for nothing more than EVERYTHING that I have....which is all of my human-ness and my brokenness, for He delights in this offering of mine, because it is truly ALL that I HAVE to give to Him....because anything in me that is good, is already Him!

I found myself driving passed the church, without any kids in the car, without any place to be for the next little while, DURING a scheduled Confession time....I thanked Him as I slowly walked into the beautiful reverent and dimly lit Sanctuary, happy to be there, tired of the load of burdens that I had been carrying on my weakend shoulders (ready to lay them down) but also a little fearful of facing my soul in this way

"Bless me father, for I have sinned"

"Lamb of God, You take away the sins of the world, have mercy on us"

"Lamb of God, You take away the sins of the world, have mercy on us"

"Lamb of God, You take away the sins of the world, grant us peace"

"Lord, I am not worthy that You should enter under my roof, but only say the word and my soul shall be healed"

30 minutes later, as the sun was setting and the sky was growing dark.....I felt EXACTLY like this.......

(and I could hear the song "Pride", by U2...Better known as "In the Name of Love"a hit from the 80's, playing loudly in my mind)
"Father, all Powerful and ever-living God, we do well always and everywhere to give You thanks and praise.  You never cease to call us to a new and more abundant life"

ISAAC AT THE PARK

LITTLE ISAAC LOVES THE PARK

HIS PURE ENJOYMENT BROUGHT JEREMY AND I SO MUCH JOY

WE NAMED ISAAC'S BIG MOUTH SMILE, "PURE WONDERMENT"

BEAUTIFUL TEXAS AUTUMN MORNING

This was the first cool morning of the year and so Jeremy and I got dressed in fall colors...

(i love fall...just wanted to remember what a great morning it was...My amazing girlfriends bought me this beautiful designer bag for my birthday and I had to capture it's maiden fall voyage...It just screams "I am fall...I am love!)

....and took Isaac out for breakfast....and then we... 

WENT TO THE BEST PARK EVER

What an amazing morning!  I love breakfast with my boys!  Jeremy and I had such a great morning, indeed!  What a total blessing God gave us today!  I will be smiling for the rest of the week!

God....You are so good.....I am always in awe of the gifts that you give to Your undeserving daughter....me!

Thank You Father.....and I love You