Wednesday, September 12


"Please don't take my Sunshine away"
Last night, I had the most magnificent dream
I dreamt that Jesus allowed me to hold Gracie Ann
My Sweet Jesus so lovingly gave me the gift to snuggle Gracie Ann for the ENTIRE night
And I never wanted it to end
Before Gracie Ann went to Heaven, I slept with her each and every night.  
I remember that being my favorite part of my day.
It was always quiet and dark and I would climb into my bed with her sweet little cradle pushed up to the side. 
She was always already asleep as I got into bed and I would get all settled in under my covers and then reach over and pick her up. 

 She would wake for just a moment and "coo" and usually let out a tired and quiet sigh.  
She fit perfectly in this tiny spot inside of my arms.  And nose to nose, we would both drift off to, listening to her tiny sweet baby breathes

I don't remember Gracie Ann actually talking to me, but I kept asking her if it was time for her to go back.....praying that Jesus would allow me to hold her in my arms, for just one more minute.
Of course as all dreams ended, and I was back in my bed alone.  No cradle pushed up to my bedside and no little sweet baby breathes warming my face.
Right when I got out of bed, I told Jeremy about my dream, as he was getting ready for work.  
Without a thought, Jeremy said that he believed that my dream was more than just a dream.....that our Sweet Jesus actually gave me one more night to hold my littlest baby girl in my arms.
Oh, how I have missed her....
Tears welled up in my eyes as Jeremy told me his thoughts on my dream.
In scripture, there are a lot of messages sent in "dreams", by our Lord God.

Maybe this wasn't just a dream....maybe it was a supernatural experience, gifted to me inside of a dream.
A most wonderful blessing from Jesus Christ, my Loving Father, my Mighty Creator, my Merciful Lord
He always continues to make His little girl (me) smile, with wonderful surprises, just because He loves to please His children so much. 

Our song for Gracie Ann has always been,
"You Are My Sunshine"
It is a song that Isaac used to sing to sweet Gracie Ann when she was still alive.
Now I sing it to Isaac (most of the time he sings it with me) every night after we pray together.

That same song, is the song that we still sing to Gracie Ann, each and every time we visit her at our church's Columbarium.
This song....though not written about Divine things, has proven to be most providential in her life and in our sorrows

"The other night dear, as I say sleeping
I dreamt I held you in my arms,
when I awoke dear, I was mistaken,
and I hung my head and I cried"

Oh, Thank You my Jesus,
Thank You for allowing me to have this special time with Gracie Ann.  I know that she is safe in Heaven with You, oh but I miss her so much Jesus.  I wouldn't want her anywhere else, but I long for her with all of my heart.
My arms feel empty with my baby girl gone.
Thank You again for entrusting me with this most beaming, most exquisite and brilliant cross.   It's precious jewels are the most dazzling that I have ever laid my eyes on, but this radiant cross is such a heavy cross Lord.
I am just too small. I am just too scared. I am too weak and I am just too scrawny....
Thank You Jesus for carrying this most magnificent and glorious cross for me
I love You with all of my heart, with all that I am, and with all that I will ever be, today, tomorrow, and for always
kerry ann
Jesus, I trust in You