MY LITANY OF HUMILITY
I am always sure to remember that our Lord answers each and every prayer that we lay at His Most Beautiful and Holy Feet. He loves us too much to ever ignore even one of His children.
I am so filled with gratitude for His undying and Perfect Love for me that I want nothing more in this life than to grow in holiness and to be made pure and pleasing to Christ.
I constantly pray for humility and charity of heart, before all else. Well today, as like many days, in His loving Goodness, He gave me the opportunity to practice this humility that I greatly pray for.
Here's where I am right now....yes that is the ER. I guess I didn't drag Jeremy to enough appointments yesterday (my poor husband!!...I love you Jeremy, you are too good to me)
HERE'S THE STORY
I have two medications that look identical. One, I infuse through my IV and another one that I nebulize orally. Well, you guessed it, I infused the nebulized med into my IV!!! Right when we realized it (when I went looking for the med to nebulize and couldn't find it) we called my transplant doc. They told me that it was probably okay, but that they needed me to come in for blood work and to be checked out in the hospital overnight.
Jeremy and I packed as I cried over how stupid I had been by putting the wrong medication into my IV....the humility of having to drag my husband back to UT Southwestern and the humility of appearing so careless to my wonderful doctors, who entrusted me with these beautiful new lungs. And finally, the humility of disappointing my kids by being gone yet again and at my own fault, no less.
Of course everyone at the hospital was so kind and loving to me! Even my ER doctor filled me with stories of mistakes in the past, to try and make me feel better!!
But the person at the ER admissions couldn't help but ask me....."Why did you do that?" In the name of humility I did not cry, but calmly said with a smile, "I just messed up!"
Jesus still never left me as this day has worn on (of course He wouldn't leave). In fact, Just because He can and because He wants His children always joyful, we were just informed that they will draw my blood one more time after infusing a bag of IV fluids, and if my labs come back looking OK, then I get to go home tonight.
Dear Jesus,
You didn't have to but You did it anyway… Thank you
Love, kerry ann
A SHORT UPDATE
Well, I have to stay overnight after all. My doctor found some concerning numbers in my blood (he is still saying that it's probably fine), but oddly enough these numbers do not have anything to do with my mistake from this morning.
Jesus is good, I will say it again!!!! I'm here for a reason......He continues to keep close watch over me, like any loving father does when his little girl is sick. I give thanks to Him for His Goodness and I am just so grateful for all of the faithful who are praying for me.
I love you my Dear Jesus…Always and Forever
and I promise.....
We will praise You in this storm
"The Lord giveth...The Lord taketh away...Blessed be the Name of the Lord"
(Job 1:21)
